Why do Good Men stop

Doing things around the house?

 

 

In the YouTube video “Why Good Men Stop Doing Things Around the House,” the speaker discusses how nagging can negatively impact relationships and lead men to stop helping with household tasks.

She explains that nagging can take different forms, from

1. constantly reminding men about tasks
2. to taking over and
3. silently showing disapproval
4. And various theatrics
5. Not to mention, backbiting, and gossip.

 

This behavior can cause men to withdraw, lose interest, lose respect, and lose confidence, which in turn affects the relationship. .

 

 

We nag our husbands. [That’s what we do.]

I hear from a lot of women say: I’m not a nag. I’m not a nag.

I want you to assume, you are.

If you tell yourself you are not, and you deny it: You will never see it.

What I’ve needed to see about myself as a woman is: there are covert ways that I nag.

It’s not always overt.

So you want to Shine the Light to see: How am I a nag?

Nagging is constantly reminding our husbands about the things they are not doing.

We can do that in a number of ways. It doesn’t have to even be overt but constantly reminding them about the things they are not doing.

What we want to understand is the more a woman nags: The less willing a man is to accomplish the task or request.

I will say that again, because that’s really important:

The more as women, that we nag, the less willing a man is to accomplish the task or request that we have of them.

“When are you going to do this? 

You haven’t done this yet.”

One of the covert ways we might do, is maybe we ask them to do the dishes in the sink, and we go and we stand, and we just look at the dishes, and then maybe walk off in a puff and they see us.

That’s nagging.

So we use nagging as a way to prove: we can’t count on our husbands to do anything.

Then even more crushing is: we’ll say, “Fine! I’ll do it myself!”

And then we take over and we do it.

Another way we nag: is the silent takeover.

I’ll use the dishes example again. We ask our husband to do the dishes. He needs a little time to decompress, and then he’s going to get to it, but it’s not done on our time—when we want it— so then we just go over and start doing the dishes.

And our husband’s hear us loudly clanking around in the kitchen making our point.

You didn’t do this,  therefore, I needed you to do this.

When we nag as women: the natural reaction from a good man is he stops trying.

He will withdraw. 

1. Because he has self-respect, and doesn’t want to entangle himself in the disrespectful theatrical business.
2. Because participating in the nagging behavior, destroys his love and honor  connection with his wife..
3. Therefore, He Rebels, disengages, and continues to invest less and less, of his time, energy, soul, self-respect, and concern for anything that is prompted by nagging behavior. 

Summary Key Points

1. Nagging can have negative effects on relationships and cause men to withdraw and lose self-respect.
2. Nagging can take various forms, from constant reminders to silent disapproval.
3. Women can improve their relationships by addressing their own underlying issues.
4. Men can benefit from a course designed to help them regain confidence and navigate relationships more constructively.
5. The speaker offers separate courses for men and women to improve their relationships.