Book & Video Review 

The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, by Dr. Laura Schlessinger.

A relationship advice book aimed at helping women improve their marriages: by better understanding and meeting their husbands’ emotional and physical needs.

The book is based on Dr. Laura’s experience as a radio talk show host, where she has given advice to countless callers about marriage and relationships.

Key Themes and Summary:

1. Men Need Appreciation and Respect
   • Dr. Laura emphasizes that men thrive on respect and admiration from their wives. She argues that many women unknowingly demean or criticize their husbands, leading to resentment and marital problems. Instead, she encourages women to express gratitude and admiration.
2. Men Are Simple, Women Overcomplicate Things
   • The book suggests that men’s needs are straightforward—love, respect, sex, and companionship—while women often overanalyze and complicate relationship issues. Dr. Laura advises women to approach their husbands with more understanding and simplicity.
3. Sex is Important to a Happy Marriage
   • Dr. Laura stresses that physical intimacy is a key part of a man’s emotional well-being. She argues that many women underestimate how important sex is to their husbands and how it affects their overall happiness and connection in the marriage.
4. Nagging and Criticism Kill Relationships
   • Constantly correcting or nagging a husband can make him feel inadequate and unappreciated. Instead, Dr. Laura encourages wives to focus on their husbands’ positive qualities and to communicate needs respectfully.
5. Wives Have More Power in the Relationship Than They Realize
   • She argues that women set the emotional tone of the marriage. A warm, appreciative, and affectionate wife can inspire a man to be more loving and engaged. Conversely, a cold or critical wife can drive emotional distance.
6. Men Want to Make Their Wives Happy
   • The book asserts that most husbands genuinely want to please their wives but often feel discouraged if they feel like they can never do anything right.
7. Balancing Career and Marriage
   • Dr. Laura advises that while women can pursue careers, they should not neglect their roles as wives if they want a strong, happy marriage. She challenges the idea that a husband should automatically pick up more responsibilities at home without acknowledgment of traditional gender dynamics.

Overall Message:

The book advocates for a return to traditional gender roles, where wives focus more on nurturing and supporting their husbands. Dr. Laura believes that by doing so, women will not only create happier marriages but also receive more love and devotion from their husbands in return.

While the book has been praised by some for its practical advice, others criticize it for being outdated (not politically feminist enough) and placing too much responsibility on women for the success of a marriage.

Summary

This audiobook review praises Dr. Laura Schlessinger’s “Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands,” highlighting its humorous approach to improving marital communication and relationships. The reviewer emphasizes the book’s focus on women taking proactive steps to nurture their relationships, including showing admiration, avoiding the blame game, and understanding differing biological sex drives. It cautions against the negativity often found in women’s groups and advocates for prioritizing the marital relationship. The reviewer particularly enjoyed the audiobook’s narration and the insightful section on sex.

Highlights

1.  Humorous and Straightforward Approach: The reviewer found Dr. Laura’s presentation style both entertaining and effective.
2.  Focus on Appreciation and Admiration: The book emphasizes the importance of showing appreciation and admiration for one’s husband.
3.  Addressing the Blame Game and Resentment: The review highlights the book’s advice on avoiding the blame game and managing resentment in relationships.
4.  Prioritizing the Marital Relationship: The book suggests prioritizing the marital relationship over other activities, especially those that promote negativity towards husbands.
5.  Insightful Discussion on Sex and Biology: The review notes a helpful discussion on the differences in male and female sex drives and their impact on relationships.