How Men can Buildup Their Homes

How Men can Buildup

Or Tear down their own house

Matthew 7:24-27 (KJV)

24 Therefore whosoever:

heareth these sayings of mine,

and doeth them,

I will liken him unto a wise man,

which built his house upon a rock:

25 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.

26 And every one that

heareththese sayings of mine,

and doeth them not,

shall be likened unto a foolish man,

which built his house upon the sand:

27 And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.

Every man, and every believer, has a choice to make. God gives him or her the privilege to decide what kind of house they are going to build for themselves to live in. God, in no way forces a man to build his house up upon a rock. He doesn’t force a man to build his house upon wisdom. He doesn’t force a man to use proper, Bill materials, or quality building, tools, and procedures. All these decisions, God leaves to the builder, which is you.

Any man who builds his house on the rock, which is the symbol of Jesus in the Old Testament: his house will stand, even when mighty storm comes against it, even when the floods rise and beat upon that house. It will stand.

But any man who built his house upon the sand, which is a symbol of this ever shifting and shaking world, based on human tradition and human wisdom, human prejudices, and intelligence, that is in rebellion to God, when the storm comes against this house, it shall fall. And great shall be the fall of it.

So you can see the choice Hass to be made by the builder. And of course we’re not talking about physical buildings, but rather the temple God has given you. To be used for his glory, or it will be used for the glory of the world, the kingdom of darkness, whether or not you like it or believe it, you will become a servant of Satan by default, and he will do his well, and he will reject God’s will.

Now, don’t get mad at me. That’s not my message coming from my own opinion, or my own interpretation, or my own perspective. That’s God’s perspective. I’m just the mailman I just deliver the mail. I don’t write the letters, my only job is to deliver the mail. God is the author of light and life, and he brings them both to us through his word.

For this particular post, we are going to investigate the topic of how men tear down their homes with their own hands, by their own habits, attitudes, deficiencies, insecurities, addictions, immaturity, and the basic old serpent, lies, sins, and transgressions against God and man. All these things will destroy a man, and his house, his family, and even his future genealogy.

God’s covenant says that the sins of the father will visit the sons to the third and fourth generation. But the blessings of the father will visit the sons to a 1000 generations.

In what ways do men destroy their homes from a biblical perspective?

How do men destroy their homes?

Lack of spiritual leadership (1 Corinthians 16:13-16): Men are called to be spiritual leaders in their homes, providing guidance and protection.

Infidelity and sexual immorality (Proverbs 5-7, Matthew 5:27-30): Adultery and sexual sin can destroy trust and relationships.

Anger, violence, and abuse (Ephesians 5:25-33, 1 Peter 3:7): Physical or emotional abuse harms family members.

Neglect and abandonment (1 Timothy 5:8): Failing to provide or care for family members leads to destruction.

Dishonesty and deceit (Ephesians 4:25): Lying and hiding truth erodes trust.

Addiction (Proverbs 23:29-35): Substance abuse or other addictions harm relationships.

Unforgiveness and bitterness (Matthew 6:14-15): Holding grudges destroys relationships.

Financial mismanagement (Proverbs 22:7): Irresponsible financial decisions harm family stability.

Lack of communication and conflict resolution (Ephesians 4:26-27): Unaddressed conflicts escalate.

Disregarding biblical principles (Psalm 127:1-5): Ignoring God’s blueprint for family leads to destruction.

These actions contradict biblical teachings on loving and caring for one’s family.

outline source: meta.ai

Let’s dive deeper:

1. Lack of spiritual leadership (1 Corinthians 16:13-16)

Men are called to lead their families spiritually, guiding them in prayer, Bible study, and faith development. Neglecting this responsibility can lead to spiritual decay.

2. Infidelity and sexual immorality (Proverbs 5-7, Matthew 5:27-30)

Adultery and sexual sin:

Destroy trust

Harm relationships

Lead to emotional and spiritual damage

Can result in physical consequences (STDs, unplanned pregnancies)

3. Anger, violence, and abuse (Ephesians 5:25-33, 1 Peter 3:7)

Physical or emotional abuse:

Creates fear and anxiety

Damages self-esteem

Leads to emotional scars

Can result in physical harm

4. Neglect and abandonment (1 Timothy 5:8)

Failing to provide or care for family members:

Causes emotional pain

Leads to feelings of rejection

Neglects physical and emotional needs

5. Dishonesty and deceit (Ephesians 4:25)

Lying and hiding truth:

Erodes trust

Destroys credibility

Creates an environment of suspicion

6. Addiction (Proverbs 23:29-35)

Substance abuse or other addictions:

Harms relationships

Neglects responsibilities

Leads to financial and emotional struggles

7. Unforgiveness and bitterness (Matthew 6:14-15)

Holding grudges:

Creates resentment

Destroys relationships

Hinders spiritual growth

8. Financial mismanagement (Proverbs 22:7)

Irresponsible financial decisions:

Causes stress

Leads to debt

Neglects family needs

9. Lack of communication and conflict resolution (Ephesians 4:26-27)

Unaddressed conflicts:

Escalate tensions

Damage relationships

Create an environment of tension

10. Disregarding biblical principles (Psalm 127:1-5)

Ignoring God’s blueprint for family:

Leads to chaos

Destroys unity

Neglects spiritual guidance

To overcome these destructive patterns, men can:

Seek spiritual guidance

Cultivate open communication

Practice forgiveness and humility

Prioritize family needs

Seek accountability

outline source: meta.ai

How does Proverbs handle men’s anger issues?

This is one very common problem for men and communication, especially with their wives and women in general.

It seems like an Achilles heel for many to quickly go from being impatient, to frustrated, to, confused, to angry, to verbally attacking–from 0 to 60 mph in four seconds flat. I believe this is one of those sins that have been passed down to Family lines, that continue to be passed down. Sexual sin is another one that’s passed down. Financial and security is another one that can be passed down.

For every man of God, seeking the kingdom of heaven first, and wants all of the “these things” to be added unto him, such a man needs to deal with all the family issues passed down to him. He needs to basically put a sign on his spiritual desk that says: “the buck stops here.”

This page has been a little bit of a laundry list of things that most men will need to deal with, conquer, and overcome, in order to be the man of God, and the leader of God, and the righteous head of the household, that he was called and ordained to be. Below is just one more highlighted, laundry, list item called anger, or uncontrolled anger that needs to be dealt with:

The Book of Proverbs addresses men’s anger issues, providing wisdom on consequences and solutions:

Consequences of uncontrolled anger:

Violence and harm (Proverbs 3:31-32, 16:29)

Strife and conflict (Proverbs 15:18, 17:14, 29:22)

Destruction of relationships (Proverbs 11:29, 14:1, 15:4)

Loss of reputation (Proverbs 25:28)

Self-destruction (Proverbs 6:27-28, 11:17)

Characteristics of angry men:

Foolishness (Proverbs 14:1, 17:12)

Lack of wisdom (Proverbs 10:23, 14:17)

Quick temper (Proverbs 14:29, 16:32)

Contention (Proverbs 15:18, 26:21)

Cruelty (Proverbs 11:17, 27:4)

Solutions for managing anger:

Wisdom and understanding (Proverbs 1:7, 10:23)

Self-control (Proverbs 16:32, 25:28)

Patience (Proverbs 14:29, 15:18)

Forgiveness (Proverbs 10:12, 17:9)

Seeking wisdom from God (Proverbs 2:6, 9:10)

Key verses:

“A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.” (Proverbs 15:18)

“A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.” (Proverbs 19:11)

“Better a patient person than a warrior, one with self-control than one who takes a city.” (Proverbs 16:32)

How accurately can contempt in a relationship, predict its longevity and quality of life?

Often times when a man is dealing with anger issues in a relationship, it may not be just something wrong inside himself. It may be a response to things going on around him that are trying to take him down. There are some spiritual problems that people bring to the table that are very sly, subtle, and subversive, but not easy to recognize. The spirit of contempt is just one of those things. So I’ve listed it here again just for more review.

When dealing with anger on one side of the coin, it might be important to flip the coin over and see if contempt is what is causing some of the root problems of the anger in a relationship.

outline source: meta.ai

Contempt:

Contempt in a relationship is a strong predictor of its longevity, or lack there of.

Research by Dr. John Gottman, a renowned relationship expert, suggests that contempt is the single most significant predictor of divorce.

Gottman’s Research Findings:

Contempt is a stronger predictor of divorce than anger or criticism.

Couples who express contempt are 3.5 times more likely to divorce.

Contempt can predict divorce with 90% accuracy.

Effects of Contempt on Relationships:

Erodes trust and intimacy

Creates defensiveness and hostility

Increases conflict and criticism

Decreases emotional connection and empathy

Leads to emotional disengagement

Types of Contempt:

Sarcasm

Eye-rolling

Mocking

Condescension

Disrespectful tone

Consequences on Quality of Life:

Increased stress and anxiety

Decreased emotional well-being

Reduced relationship satisfaction

Negative impact on physical health

Decreased overall happiness

Predicting Longevity:

High levels of contempt: Relationship likely to end within 5-7 years

Moderate levels: Relationship may last 10-15 years, but quality of life suffers

Low levels: Relationship can thrive, but efforts to manage conflicts are crucial

Reversing Contempt:

Practice empathy and active listening

Address conflicts constructively

Foster respect and appreciation

Cultivate a culture of gratitude

Seek couples therapy

While contempt is a significant predictor, it’s not the sole determining factor. Relationships can recover with effort and commitment.

outline source: meta.ai

—From God's Perspective

How do men destroy their homes?

Let’s dive deeper:

How does Proverbs handle men’s anger issues?

Contempt:

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